I wonder if Magic Johnson ever regrets wasting the world’s best porn name on a basketball career
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My body is like a temple. Actually, to be more precise, it’s more like a Roman Catholic church: full of wine and bread.
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This week’s Million-Dollar-Idea: Open a restaurant called “Peace and Quiet” where kids’ meals are $250.
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When I die, I don’t want to see my entire life flash before my eyes; I just want to see a highlight reel of all the best shots I’ve made tossing things into trash cans.
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Okay, I have a question. How come the logo for Universal Studios is just the Earth?
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It’s really sad how Wile E. Coyote is remembered only for his violence, and not for his brilliantly realistic paintings of tunnels.
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Does it trip anyone else out that “G” is just an arrow going in a circle?
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I like Freudian Slips as much as the next gay.
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Shout out to people wondering what the opposite of in is.
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Bill Gates and I have a combined fortune of around 80 billion dollars.
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