The
human brain is amazing. It functions 24/7 from they day you were born and only stops
when you’re taking a test or talking to someone attractive.
~~~~~
What’s
green and eats nuts?
Syphilis.
~~~~~
What do
you call a 2000-pound toilet that sings?
El Ton
John
~~~~~
I used
to have a quite successful origami business.
But then
it folded.
(Ba-DUM, tsss)
~~~~~
Call me
old fashioned, but I prefer girls with eyebrows made out of hair.
~~~~~
I wish
people randomly offered me weed as much as middle school health classes made it
seem they would.
~~~~~
How do
you tell a plumber from a chemist?
Ask them
to pronounce “unionized.”
~~~~~
A
Mexican magician tells his audience that he will disappear on the count of
three. He then says, “Uno, dos…” and then *POOF* …
He
disappeared without a tres.
~~~~~
If I was
a rapper, I’d be Lay-Z
