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SKIP'S HOUSE OF CHAOS IS BACK!

After a 9-month unavoidable absence, the original Skip's House of Chaos is back online. From now until December 31, both it and Chaos Unbridled (this one) will run concurrently. As of January 1, 2016, this site will become inactive (but all previous posts will remain available), and all new posts will be solely on the new (old) site.

Monday, August 24, 2015

One day, in the old Soviet Union...

Stalin is giving a long speech at an event, naturally in front of a huge audience. While he's in full flow, somebody near the front of the hall sneezes. Stalin stops and surveys the crowd.

"Who sneezed?" he asks.

Deathly silence.

"I repeat," says Stalin, "who sneezed?"

Not a peep.

"Very well," says Stalin. "First row, stand up!" Everyone in the first row stands up. "Guards! Open fire!"

A few seconds later, the entire first row of the audience is lying in bloody heaps on the ground.

"Now, who sneezed?" Still not a whimper. "Second row, stand up! Guards! Open fire!" The second row writhes and breathes its last.

"Now, comrades: who sneezed?" Absolute silence. "Third row! Stand up! Guards! Op...."

"Wait! Wait!" From the sixth row a man rises, shaking so hard with fear that he can barely stay on his legs. "Please! Comrade Stalin! It was me. I sneezed."

Stalin fixes his eye on the wretch. The entire audience watches, paralysed.

"You sneezed?"

"Yes, Comrade Stalin, yes. It was me."

"Bless you, comrade!"



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