The secret to cooking
perfect eggs is to start by melting some butter in a frying pan, then crack
open a couple of eggs, sprinkle with some salt and pepper, maybe a little Smokehouse
Maple seasoning, wait until the top part of the eggs have solidified somewhat.
YOU TAKE THAT PAN AND
YOU USE SOME WRIST ACTION AND YOU SAY A PRAYER AND YOU JUST FLIP THOSE EGGS IN
THE AIR WITHOUT A SPATULA AND THEY COME DOWN LIKE A SLOW-MOTION
SLAM-DUNK-PERFECT-IN-THE-PAN AND YOU HEAR THAT SIZZLE AND YOU ARE THE GOD OF
EGGS AND IRON CHEF BOBBY FLAY AND A FREAKIN’ WIZARD!
Oh, and then you have to
brag about it on the Internets.
Seriously you guys, it
was beautiful. I cried.
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