Each August since 1998, Beloit
College has released the Beloit College Mindset List, providing a look at the
cultural touchstones that shape the lives of students entering college this
fall.
As for the class of 2015, without
any memory whatever of George Herbert Walker Bush as president, they came into
existence as Bill Clinton came into the presidency. Their parents, frequently
older than one might expect because women have always been able to get pregnant
almost regardless of age, have hovered over them with extra care and have
agreed with those states that mandated the wearing of bike helmets. Ferris
Bueller could be their overly cautious dad, and Jimmy Carter is an elderly
smiling public man who appears occasionally on television doing good works.
“Dial-up,” Woolworths and the Sears “Big Book” are as antique to them as
“talking machines” might have been to their grandparents. Meanwhile, as they’ve
wondered why O.J. Simpson has always been suspected of something, they have all
“been there, done that, gotten the Tshirt,” shortened boring conversations with
“yadda, yadda, yadda,” and recognized LBJ as LeBron James.
For those who cannot comprehend
that it has been 18 years since this year’s class was born, they will quickly
confirm that the next four years will go even faster and, like the rest of us,
they will continue to grow older at increasing speed.
So, without further ado,
allow me to present to you…
The Mindset
List for the Class of 2015
Andre the Giant, River Phoenix,
Frank Zappa, Arthur Ashe and the Commodore 64 have always been dead.
Their classmates could include
Taylor Momsen, Angus Jones, Howard Stern's daughter Ashley, and the Dilley
Sextuplets.
1 There has always been an Internet
ramp onto the information highway.
2 Ferris Bueller and Sloane Peterson
could be their parents.
3 States and Velcro parents have
always been requiring that they wear their bike helmets.
4 The only significant labor disputes
in their lifetimes have been in major league sports.
5 There have nearly always been at
least two women on the Supreme Court, and women have always commanded U.S. Navy
ships.
6 They “swipe” cards, not
merchandise.
7 As they’ve grown up on websites and
cell phones, adult experts have constantly fretted about their alleged deficits
of empathy and concentration.
8
Their school’s “blackboards” have
always been getting smarter.
9
“Don’t touch that dial!”….what
dial?
10
American tax forms have always been
available in Spanish.
11
More Americans have always traveled
to Latin America than to Europe.
12
Amazon has never been just a river
in South America.
13
Refer to LBJ, and they might assume
you're talking about LeBron James.
14
All their lives, Whitney Houston
has always been declaring “I Will Always Love You.”
15
O.J. Simpson has always been
looking for the killers of Nicole Simpson and Ronald Goldman.
16
Women have never been too old to
have children.
17
Japan has always been importing
rice.
18
Jim Carrey has always been bigger
than a pet detective.
19
We have never asked, and they have
never had to tell.
20
Life has always been like a box of
chocolates.
21
They’ve always gone to school with
Mohammed and Jesus.
22
John Wayne Bobbitt has always slept
with one eye open.
23
The Communist Party has never been
the official political party in Russia.
24
“Yadda, yadda, yadda” has always come
in handy to make long stories short.
25
Video games have always had
ratings.
26
Chicken soup has always been soul
food.
27
The Rocky Horror Picture
Show has always been available on TV.
28
Jimmy Carter has always been a
smiling elderly man who shows up on TV to promote fair elections and disaster
relief.
29
Arnold Palmer has always been a
drink.
30
Dial-up is soooooooooo last
century!
31
Women have always been kissing
women on television.
32
Their older siblings have told them
about the days when Britney Spears, Justin Timberlake and Christina Aguilera
were Mouseketeers.
33
Most have grown up with a faux
Christmas Tree in the house at the holidays.
34
They’ve always been able to dismiss
boring old ideas with “been there, done that, gotten the T-shirt.”
35
The bloody conflict between the
government and a religious cult has always made Waco sound a little whacko.
36
Unlike their older siblings, they
spent bedtime on their backs until they learned to roll over.
37
Music has always been available via
free downloads.
38
Grown-ups have always been arguing
about health care policy.
39
Moderate amounts of red wine and baby
aspirin have always been thought good for the heart.
40
Sears has never sold anything out
of a Big Book that could also serve as a doorstop.
41
The United States has always been
shedding fur.
42
Electric cars have always been
humming in relative silence on the road.
43
No longer known for just gambling
and quickie divorces, Nevada has always been one of the fastest growing states
in the Union.
44
They’re the first generation to
grow up hearing about the dangerous overuse of antibiotics.
45
They pressured their parents to
take them to Taco Bell or Burger King to get free pogs.
46
Russian courts have always had
juries.
47
No state has ever failed to observe
Martin Luther King Day.
48
While they’ve been playing outside,
their parents have always worried about nasty new bugs borne by birds and
mosquitoes.
49
Public schools have always made
space available for advertising.
50
Some of them have been inspired to
actually cook by watching the Food Channel.
51
Fidel Castro’s daughter and
granddaughter have always lived in the United States.
52
Their parents have always been able
to create a will and other legal documents online.
53
Charter schools have always been an
alternative.
54
They’ve grown up with George
Stephanopoulos as the Dick Clark of political analysts.
55
New Kids have always been known as
NKOTB.
56
They’ve always wanted to be like
Shaq or Kobe: Michael Who?
57
They’ve often broken up with their
significant others via texting, Facebook, or MySpace.
58
Their parents sort of remember Woolworths
as this store that used to be downtown.
59
Kim Jong-il has always been
bluffing, but the West has always had to take him seriously.
60
Frasier, Sam, Woody and Rebecca
have never Cheerfully frequented a bar in Boston during primetime.
61
Major League Baseball has never had
fewer than three divisions and never lacked a wild card entry in the playoffs.
62
Nurses have always been in short
supply.
63
They won’t go near a retailer that
lacks a website.
64
Altar girls have never been a big
deal.
65
When they were 3, their parents may
have battled other parents in toy stores to buy them a Tickle Me Elmo while
they lasted.
66
It seems the United States has
always been looking for an acceptable means of capital execution.
67
Folks in Hanoi and Ho Chi Minh City
have always been able to energize with Pepsi Cola.
68
Andy Warhol is a museum in
Pittsburgh.
69
They’ve grown up hearing about
suspiciously vanishing frogs.
70
They’ve always had the privilege of
talking with a chatterbot.
71
Refugees and prisoners have always
been housed by the U.S. government at Guantanamo.
72
Women have always been Venusians;
men, Martians.
73
McDonalds coffee has always been
just a little too hot to handle.
74
“PC” has come to mean Personal Computer,
not Political Correctness.
75 The New York Times and the Boston Globe have never been rival newspapers.
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